Notes on how I save, and how I splurge
A reader asked about my approach to saving and spending money, and I thought it might be a fun thing to dig into a little more deeply. My overall approach to money: save so that I can splurge. No surprises here: I’m super routine- and cost-driven in my everyday life, which allows me to spend more money on travel, experiences and wellness.
I am very cost-conscious and do not like wasting money: this can be nicely described as frugal or efficient (or: cheap). When I was a kid, I was notorious for saving my money (and I did a lot of odd jobs to earn it) and refusing to spend it. I would ask for something, and my mom would suggest that I spend some of my own money on it…and suddenly I wouldn’t need it THAT badly! That said, I started saving Christmas and birthday money for a car when I was 12, and managed to buy a car when I turned 16: so my hoarding habits have paid off!
A few fun ways in which this extreme saving manifests: I hate paying for parking: I will usually park far away and walk if it’s possible to avoid a meter, and I never valet. In New York, I took the subway or biked or walked; I rarely took a taxi or Uber if I wasn’t expensing it. My grocery shopping each week is carefully calibrated for our meals and needs: I hate throwing away food, and I don’t like buying more of something if we haven’t finished what’s in the cupboard. I’m a bit of a control freak when it comes to the grocery shopping because of this, and because I’m very cost-conscious. I’ve always dealt with some of the madness at Trader Joe’s (especially in New York) because of how much cheaper it is. Little tidbit here: I was chatting with friends about almond milk the other day, and I mentioned how my new favorite “splurge” is Califia Farms—and my friend was like, it’s $4, is that really a splurge? But it is more expensive per ounce than the generic brand or Blue Diamond, so I do consider it a splurge—even though it is significantly more delicious, IMO! I also don’t eat out more than once or twice a week, unless I’m traveling or something has thrown a major wrench into my meal planning. I never buy “because I’m hungry” snacks unless I’m on the verge of passing out from starvation—I either eat a snack that’s packed in my bag (like RXBARs or apple slices), or I wait until I’m home or at a proper meal time.
Similarly, I don’t mindlessly buy clothes or makeup. I have 10 items in my makeup bag, and that’s it: priming moisturizer, skin perfecting tint, pressed powder, concealer, highlighter, blush, bronzer, mascara, one eyeliner and one eyeshadow. I’ll replace those items as needed (and I have recently considered buying a couple more eyeshadows for special occasions), but I don’t really feel the need to have several blushes or bronzers or whatever. I don’t go browsing at Sephora and buy things to experiment with. I find what I like, and I stick with that. The same goes for clothes: I have three pairs of jeans (dark, light and black), and that’s it. I’d rather spend more money on one pair of jeans that I love (and wear those jeans until they fall apart) than have a bunch of cheaper pairs. I will say that RTR Unlimited has shifted my habits a bit in my wardrobe: I’d rather pay the monthly fee and have access to infinite pieces than spend $200 on a dress for a wedding that I’ll only wear once.
I detailed this more in notes on my financial routine, but I abhor any kind of bank fee: I avoid pulling money out of private ATMs at all costs, I pay off my credit card every month, I have never overdrawn on an account. I have monthly automatic deductions set up to maximize my contributions to my Roth IRA, 401K and savings account: the money left in my checking account is what’s OK to spend for the month. I try to put as much as possible on credit cards to accrue points, but it’s never more than I can immediately pay off. I rarely pull money from my savings into my checking (it’s there to save, not spend!) but every once in a while (mostly if I’m planning a big trip!), I’ll do a one-time transfer as a reward.
All of that said: I do like to have some fun! I splurge in a few major areas: travel, experiences and personal care. I feel very grateful to have no debt, a regular paycheck in my day job, sporadic freelance income and a lifestyle that allows me to spend most of my disposable income on travel (aka I don’t have kids!).
Although I’ve lived through a lot of verrrry frugal travel, I’m now at a point in my life where I want to be comfortable when I travel. I try to be strategic in how I spend my money on travel. I’m loyal to a few airlines (Southwest and Delta, as well as Delta Sky Team partners) and Starwood hotels, and I’ll generally pay more to fly or stay with them so that I can accrue points and status. I’ve gotten more into Airbnb lately as well, since I feel like I can not only find places with a wider variety of price points but I can also be more frugal when I’m traveling when I have a kitchen to have breakfast at home or store snacks in the fridge.
I also try to remember when I travel that sometimes it truly is once-in-a-lifetime. Some of my favorite travel memories are of doing things that I seriously considered not doing because of the cost (paragliding in Bavaria, bungee jumping in South Africa) but that have been priceless in memories. I don’t often buy souvenirs when I travel (some of it is a holdover from backpacking from when I literally didn’t have room to carry any more things, but it’s also being frugal), but if I see something now that really captures my eye, I’ll bring it home and I love having a tangible memory of that trip.
The biggest non-travel thing that I spend a lot of money on: personal care. I’m a big believer in the luxury of wellness! I get regular massages and facials and acupuncture, my nails are almost always manicured, my brows are waxed. I’m committed to certain skincare products. Part of it is for the vanity, but I also find that personal care time to be rejuvenating for me in the midst of a packed schedule (aka sometimes I need to be forced off my laptop or phone for an hour!). I have a ClassPass membership that I use at fancy workout studios—and I’m strategic about using it to go to high-end fitness studios where I would never pay for the class as a one-off, which I suppose is more saving than splurging.
I also have what my husband describes as “moments of indulgence,” which I would define as: splurging on a few fancy products and being very intentional about how they’re consumed. I love to set aside some time before bed or on a lazy weekend afternoon to drink a cup of nice tea (my favorite is this one that I bring home from Paris), burn an expensive candle and read a book.
Alas! I found this post I wrote back in 2011 about the 80/20 rule and how I apply it to budget travel, and I’ve got to say, not too much has really changed.
