Notes on traveling with a baby
I’ve lived in this in-between space ever since I started blogging: I’ve never wanted to be a full-time traveler. I love to travel, but I also very much love being home in my own bed and my own kitchen and my own perfectly calibrated routine. For better or worse, I live a bit in this envy of people who are off gallivanting to all of the places I want to be while also very much knowing that I would be miserable if I was always on the road. This has never been more true now that I have a baby.
We took Jojo on five (plane) trips before her first birthday: St. Louis to visit family (three months old), Vancouver for an excuse to use her passport while I was on maternity leave (five months old), Mexico City because I had PTO to burn (seven months old), Sacramento solo to visit my friends (eight months old) and New York City to visit family and friends (11 months old).
A lot of it was also just proving to myself that we *could* travel with a baby (David, respectfully, knows it is possible and wishes we didn’t have to actually prove it). And the good news is: you can! You can travel with a baby! But the reality is that (in life, as in travel), everything is just a little more complicated with a baby. The joke is that you don’t take vacation, you just travel with children. I think there is definitely an element of truth in that, and if you do want to have a semblance of a vacation, you need be super intentional about how you plan that.
Here are the biggest things that I’ve learned on those trips (and the products that I wholeheartedly recommend to make life a little easier):
Recreate their sleep environment as closely as possible
Jojo has been sleeping through the night since she was three months old, and I give full credit to Moms on Call. I really did not want traveling to disrupt her sleep routine, so we did our absolute best to stay as on schedule as possible. When there were time changes, we adopted the time of the new city as soon as we landed. We also realized (after a trip where we didn’t!) that it’s a lot easier for all of us to function if we stay in place with two bedrooms, or at the very least, a very clear sleeping “room” for Jojo.
After borrowing one from my sister-in-law on our first trip, we invested in the Guava Lotus Travel Crib and it’s 100% been worth the investment. It’s super easy to set up and take down, and the backpack carrying case is also very convenient. We’re also very big fans of Slumberpod: it basically creates a little blackout tent right over the travel crib. It’s especially helpful if you are trying to stay in the same room, since it doesn’t mean you have to live in the dark from the baby’s bedtime until yours. We also got another one of these fantastic little noise machines: they’re super portable and easy to charge. (I also bring one for us, and I love that it doubles as a little speaker!)
One thing I recommend is to set up the travel crib and the Slumberpod at home for nap time a few times before your first trip. Even though both the Guava and the Slumberpod are super easy to set up–like anything–it takes a second to get the knack of it. I was very glad I did it first in the comfort of my own home without a looming deadline to figure it out. And it was also good to have Jojo sleep in a slightly different environment with this setup a couple of times(we did it in our bedroom instead of her nursery) so she could also get used to it before our trip.
If you want a vacation, hire a babysitter
Traveling with kids can definitely be fun, but it’s kind of extra stressful because you’re trying to do all of the same parenting things but in a new, unfamiliar environment. I definitely recommend trying to carve out some time to enjoy yourselves sans baby! This can definitely be possible with takeout and a nice bottle of wine after the baby goes to sleep, or by trading off someone staying home for nap time while the other person explores solo (recommend!!). However, I think paying for a babysitter for one night (or one day) can make a really big difference in getting that fresh vacation feeling! We’ve used UrbanSitter to find babysitters in San Diego and in New York City, and we’ve always been really pleased with the quality of the babysitters that we’ve hired. A lot of hotels can also provide or recommend babysitting or nanny services, and if you’re visiting friends or family, ask if they have a trusted sitter who they can suggest.
Stay somewhere with a washer and dryer
I’ve always been a big fan of staying in a house or apartment instead of a hotel: I like having a kitchen, and to be in a more residential neighborhood than in a city’s downtown. Although you can check to see if an apartment has a pack-and-play, there are a few other things that are less flexible and can make a big difference in how comfortable the stay is.
My biggest non-negotiable is a washer-dryer: it’s just so much less stressful in case of blowouts or spit-up if you can immediately throw a load of wash in, and it also helps in terms of not having to pack quite as many clothes.
Beyond that, I always double check if there are any stairs: checking to see how ADA-compliant or accessible a property is can be very helpful to know. Now that Jojo is a little bigger, I like to book a place with a bathtub. When she was a little, a bathtub was great, but I also could make it work if there was a very big sink in either the kitchen or the bathroom (this $10 foam bath sponge mat packs down super easily and made it very easy to use a sink). For eating, this portable high chair has also been a lifesaver.
And even though we *could* make it work in a one-bedroom or hotel room, we’ve realized it is worth it for our own happiness to book a place with two bedrooms so that Jojo has her own space to nap and sleep. This means we have a little more freedom to watch TV, listen to music and just go about our day during naptime! We also have these basic baby monitors at home, and we’ll often pack them with us: for example, when we stayed at a lakehouse, they were great so that we could sit outside in the sunshine while she napped inside.
Choose one thing a day
The biggest adjustment I had to make in traveling with a baby is not being able to do it all. Womp womp womp! My travel style is definitely go-go-go and I love to see as much as I can whenever I’m in a new place. That’s a lot trickier with a baby, especially when you’re working with a two-nap-a-day schedule. My approach has been, instead, to focus on one thing a day that I want to do–whether that’s a museum, a restaurant, a park or even just sitting outside with a book. I find that this helps me prioritize what I want to do most on the trip, and what I would be most disappointed to leave without doing. It’s also good to think about if that one thing is possible with a baby.
Have a plan for the airport and plane
Flying with a baby is stressful. It just is! Long gone are the days of just waltzing through security and then settling into my seat with a ginger ale and all of the movies that I can watch! After five trips (including one on my own), I think we’ve figured out a decent routine.
Even before the day of travel, I try to schedule flights that roughly coincide with Jojo’s nap schedule so that we can *maybe* hope for some sleeping on the plane. For travel day outfits, I love Magnetic Me rompers: the magnets make the public changing table life just a little bit easier! (And because I have learned through experience: always worth it to have 1-2 backup outfits in the diaper bag!)
I’ve given up on going carry-on only for the time being, so the first stop is to immediately check the bags. I find it usually makes sense to do this inside versus with the skycaps because they often need to double-check the baby’s paperwork and issue her boarding pass in person. We keep our stroller and carseat with us to gate-check since a) it’s easier to push a baby in the stroller and use the stroller for extra storage and b) the airline is less likely to lose something that is gate-checked.
In terms of total bags: we generally have two or three checked Away bags, depending on the length of the trip and then we carry on our diaper bag, David’s backpack and my fanny pack with the essentials (keys, wallet, phone, Kindle, headphones) and then the stroller and car seat. If I’m bringing a laptop, I usually sneak it in David’s backpack.
Next, we go through security: since both David and I have TSA Precheck, Jojo also gets to take advantage of this line! (Note that this is OK for Precheck, but not for Global Entry: everyone, including babies, has to have Global Entry to go through.) You have to take *everything* out of the stroller, so we usually trade off one person being in charge of the stroller and getting all of our belongings onto the conveyor belt and the other person holding a baby. You’re allowed to bring food and liquid for a baby, so do not worry about packing formula, breast milk, or veggie pouches in your carry-on: all are OK to bring! That said, they will probably test all of those things (especially bottles): I always ask the TSA agent to put on new gloves for this. (And if you’re pumping, the breast pump counts as an extra approved carry-on as long as it’s in its own case. You can bring as much breast milk, frozen or fresh, as needed! When I pumped, I brought frozen breast milk through in a little insulated lunchbox and didn’t have any issues.)
Once we get to the gate, we immediately go chat with the gate agent. If we haven’t purchased Jojo a seat, we often go and ask about how full the flight is. Sometimes, they’re able to give us a seat at that time–and if not, it’s good to calibrate expectations of how we are dealing with a baby on our lap! We also get the tags to gate check the stroller (and car seat, if we didn’t confirm that we have an extra seat for Jojo). We use these stroller and car seat travel cover bags, and I recommend them–especially if you are traveling with your everyday stroller and car seat.
I generally want Jojo to be the very last person on the plane. If we are flying an airline like Southwest, we’ll split up so one person can go get seats while the other person stays out with Jojo; if we have assigned seats, we will all try to be the last ones to board (especially since we check bags, so who cares about getting on first!). Now that Jojo is walking, we are doing lots of laps! But even when she was a tiny baby, my goal was to change her diaper *right* before we board and have as little time in that cramped row as possible.
On the plane, I always give Jojo a bottle right as we take off and then again once we are coming in for the final descent. Basically, having something to suck on helps them regulate the pressure changes (a pacifier also works, but a bottle really means they are actively sucking). This might mean she gets some extra food on travel days, which I am 100% OK with to spare her ears and spare the plane. She hasn’t had any issues with pressure changes, which we were very grateful for: we had a lot of anxiety before her first flight because David popped an eardrum on a flight as a kid.
Pack light, and also pack whatever you need to pack
The reality is that there is just so much more crap you have to pack with a baby. However, I do try to consider anything that can be easily purchased at the destination–think diapers, snacks, formula, etc.–and bring only what’s necessary for the day of travel. I’ll either do a grocery run first thing the next morning, or if we are staying with family, I’ll do a grocery order that gets delivered before we arrive. And because I always stay somewhere with a washer-dryer, I do try to bring about half as many clothes as it feels like we need (even with the multiple daily outfit changes of a baby!). I also really try to limit how many books and toys we bring: I’ve heard great things about vacation toy rental services, which is certainly something we’ll likely try in the future. Less necessary when they are little blob! That said, I LOVE Indestructibles books: they’re impossible to ruin, and a lot lighter than a board book. Perfect to keep in the diaper bag or to pack for a trip!
I have totally converted to clear packing cubes as well: I have the light pink for Jojo, hot pink for me and blue for David, and it makes it SO much easier to keep all of our clothes organized. It’s especially nice for baby things: we had one for burp clothes, one for onesies, etc.
There are pros and cons to every age
I know I’m still at the very very beginning of this whole childhood thing with Jojo, but I can already tell: every age is going to be harder and easier in some ways! Jojo’s first trip was stressful because she was so tiny and we were still new to the whole parenting thing, but in hindsight: she slept all the time!! She was just this lovely little lump who just need a bouncer to be happy! As she’s gotten bigger and more mobile and more alert, it’s gotten a lot more challenging to set up in new spaces and convince her to nap on the plane–but it also means we get to do more fun things like find cool playgrounds and watch her experience the new surroundings.
The reality that I have come to accept is that there will never be a perfect age to travel with a baby. It’s going to make things harder in a lot of ways, that is just the truth! But I also feel like if you want to travel, a baby is very capable of coming along. And I think there is a lot to be learned about flexibility and adaptability and going with the flow–for both babies and parents!
And in short: I personally feel like it is worth it. That said, traveling with Jojo has never made me happier than to go home and be back in our wonderfully calibrated space for a baby and my comfortable bed. I don’t have the desire to travel as much as these family travel influencers are, and I’m definitely a little more wary about long flights and time changes as we transition into toddler life–but I’m hopeful that this post answered some questions and inspired some confidence to travel with a baby!
